Going Back is Difficult!

   As soon as I crossed into Memphis, Tennessee, many things as I knew them were different. I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area so I had pretty much always been surrounded by diversity. Don't be fooled by what that means though. When I dated a black man (guy) for the first time my junior year of high school, my parents were not happy. Fast forward to 5 years later when I told them I was going to marry a black man & was pregnant.....my mother flipped out and all but threw me out of the house. I have seen plenty of racial discrimination over the years (& honestly thought my ex-husband was just exaggerating & being dramatic many times when the topic came up of places in other states we shouldn't go and such) and I saw way more  segregation and racism than I care to admit in the US Military but.....being in the south (staying in Alabama now for 10 days) has been, let's just say, eye opening. I go to bed many nights with a very heavy heart. There appears to be so much racial anger in what seems like every city down here and it seems even more prevalent amongst the young people. It pains me to see so much segregation and what seems to be anger from both the white and black side. I had interesting conversations tonight with my friend's son who shared some of his beliefs. I was glad he opened up and shared but he is definitely not open to hearing another view or challenging his beliefs. So many people treat their beliefs, that have been taught by their families or society, as law.

   The friends I am staying with also had a friend and her niece over for the night, both of whom were born and raised in Alabama. They both sat up with me for a couple hours looking at my pictures and talking about "the way things are" in Alabama from paddling in schools, to the common views of the different races, to interracial dating, and much more. It was fun with these two getting to know them and them getting to know me. They were very interested in my travels and open to hearing about life outside of Alabama and far more open than my friend's son to possibly see things in a different light, which makes me sad because I thought the next generation could make some powerful changes but that does not seem to be the case down here. I even got some great suggestions for places to visit in Alabama to see plantations and other historical monuments and things.

 I am learning so much here. I always thought I was lucky to have grown up in such a diverse and open area but in a way it makes me feel like I grew up very sheltered. The Bay Area feels worlds away from here and this is just the beginning of my time in the south! I am not sure how deep to delve into the south and the way things are here because it pains me to see the way things still are down here.  It feels like what I only imagined life was like decades ago and it makes me feel like I am going backwards and not forwards. It would be great if I could plant even the smallest seed for even a person or two here and show them a life of more love for everyone!!!